Beauty

I Did A Thing! 

It only took me 21 years but I finally did a thing I’ve wanted to do since my freshman year of high school.


Excuse the silly Snapchat filter. 🙂 

My me head is delightfully fuzzy and in need of rubbing all over. I know it’ll take a little getting used to, but I don’t regret it, and it’s a great excuse to knit more hats!

My mom barely even freaked out. She just said I was crazy and I was going to freeze… Lol. 

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Crafting · General

AVIM, and Other Things

The craft thing at the Antelope Valley Indian Museum was kinda weird this year. Only two artists signed up, including myself, and the evening of, I was the only one to show up.

I did fairly well though and the octopus and owl stuffies I made sold pretty quickly. I didn’t sell all of them, but I did sell several. Kids loved them.

I ended up making I think it was $37 over my table fee which is pretty good for such a small event. I took that $37,and turned it into this :

There’s a pleco in there too somewhere – my mom bought me the fishies today. I’ve named the Oranda Alberta. 🙂

Yuba is still growing –  he and Tejon are unit into ponies. Kinda makes me wonder how big he’s going to get… Lol.

I bought a drop spindle and some fiber so I can learn to spin. I’ve only tried it a little but I think I’ll like it when I get the hang of it.

I haven’t been cleaning much the last week and a half because I killed my back moving a TV but I am trying to track down the parts we need to fix the furnace. The house hasn’t had heat in literally years and it gets freaking cold in winter.

Here’s a quick pic of some stuff.

My little Christmas tree and my super festive eyeball garland! And my super colorful curtains! Ignore the plastic bag and my shoes… Lol.

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Clean/Purge · General

Still Cleaning

I’m still finding tons of stuff to clean up around the house. I’m finally almost done throwing away my old dresser that fell apart once piece at a time each week into the trash barrel – there’s just one side and the paperboard back left – and then I can start breaking down the tons of cardboard boxes I keep unearthing and throwing them away. I wish I could just throw them all out at once, but we only get one trash barrel so it’s not possible.

I keep finding technology-related stuff too. External DVD drives, multiple hard drives too small to be of much use in the current world (I’ve found like 6 of them), a hard drive enclosure that needs a power cord… And there’s a printer new in box that I think mom bought when she had Windows 8 that was incompatible with the computer then. I need to find cables for the hard drive enclosure and see if it and the drive currently inside it works, and if not, drop it off at the elections recycling place. The same goes for the external DVD drives – I will likely test those on my mom’s computer tonight.

Today my mom brought up if I wanted half ownership of the house and property when she dies. I said yes. I don’t want to stay here unless I built a place in the back, and honestly I would still rather sell my half and find a spot of land somewhere a bit closer to town… But either way, hopefully that’s not for a long time. A really, really long time.

For Thanksgiving, I did the shopping today, and picked up a 14-pound turkey for $9. I also bought stuff to make a blackberry cheesecake Wednesday night, and I’ll make the rolls from scratch the day of. Mom still wants to get a ham, but its just going to be me and her, and we don’t need all the food… Lol. Or maybe we do. I dunno.

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Crafting · General

Christmas is Coming!

I’ve completely turned into one of those people. Its not even Thanksgiving yet and I’m itching to set up my little Christmas tree, with its tiny little ornaments, fake birds, and big fluffy bow on top. I’m ready to wrap the little crocheted tree skirt around its base, and plug in my single strand of lights after wrapping them around it. And I’m ready to start shopping, and wrapping my gifts to place under it.

I think I’ve got my mom’s Christmas gift figured out. I’m just hoping some of the components will go on sale soon (yes Black Friday / Cyber Monday, I’m looking at you!) and I can save a few bucks because it’s not an inexpensive gift I’m planning.

I had mom write me a check and mailed it off to the Antelope Valley Indian Museum so on December 2nd, I’ll be there selling my makes. I didn’t really make anything new and I actually donated a lot of my stock to thrift but it was stuff I didn’t feel amazing about and would have felt weird about selling.

I’m hoping to bring home $50 and I can put that towards Christmas shopping, but honestly the Antelope Valley Indian Museum is one of the places I like to support anyway so I’m not super concerned with heavy profiting there. I’m just glad to be able to help them out.

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Health · Kinky Fun

Even My Therapist… 

I saw my therapist Thursday and we talked about some hard stuff. Mainly my childhood, and how my still current need to be submissive and good has been pounded into me since I was a little girl – don’t get emotional, don’t cry (or I’ll give you something to cry about!), don’t get angry, don’t act out, always follow directions… Do whatever it takes to get that “good girl” and a pat on the head. She had me pegged as submissive from the first time we talked about sex and BDSM even though I hadn’t actually said how I identify.

The difference now is I can control who I give that to. I can control who I allow to punish me if I’m naughty. I am in control and I’m not the same scared little girl. But sometimes I am still scared. What if I’m not a good girl? What if I never get that gentle caress and praise?

Logically, I know the world won’t end. I’ll still be okay, I’ll still be me, but I crave those two words so strongly and I have since I was a wee thing, and I wonder if that will ever change.

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Subscription Boxes

Book of the Month #3

This month saw my book of the month delivery to come a bit earlier than I expected. My official selection is Future Home of the Living God by Louise Erdrich, and I made a bonus selection of Eat Only When You’re Hungry by Lindsay Hunter.


I’m looking forward to reading these, but first I need to finish up The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood and I have a few graphic novels still to read too, Paper Girls vol 2, and Rat Queens vol 1.

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General

Pillows! Oh my! 

I realized that pillows, even down pillows, can be washed in the washer and dryer. Suddenly the giant black trash bag full of pillows that were my dad’s and grandparents’ got really appealing. I love pillows. Like there’s no such thing as too many pillows on my bed. Begin laundering pillows, including the ones I already had. 

I had a body pillow, plus 3 regular ones. That was yesterday. 

Today I have a body pillow, plus 5 regular ones… And I have two more in the washer now. 

I’ve also made matching pillowcases for all my pillows that weren’t already dressed in some shade of wine and I think I have enough fabric left in the right shades to make the pillowcases for the last two pillows when they dry. 

My bed is no longer a bed. It’s a fluffy cloud nest. I fucking love it.

Of course if I ever get around to buying another set of sheets, I’ll have to make more pillowcases. But that’s not going to be for a little while. 

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Beauty · Subscription Boxes

Lip Monthly #1

I finally, after almost two months of waiting, got my first Lip Monthly bag and I’m just not impressed. The colors of the products I received are really Meh. I can use them, they look fine on me, but there’s no wow factor.

I’m just not impressed. The lipstick is the best of the bag, and it’s only an okay color for me. The so-called stain in the little pot is more a super soft gloss with almost no actual color. I’ll probably use it over some of my matte lipsticks to give them a little shine. The lip crayon will most likely be used on my cheeks. It’s the right shade for that at least.

Anyway, after the disappointment of this bag, I decided to cancel now and not even try a second month. It’s something like $15 a month and that’s too much to spend on unexciting products. 

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General

Yes, I Did It Again

I had therapy yesterday, which was tough, but it brought some facts to light I had never really considered before. I love therapy because even if it brings up painful things sometimes, it helps me look at myself and my actions objectively and since I’m really into facts over feelings, it honestly makes me feel better about myself, and I love that. ❤️💛💚💙💜

Today I woke up and I was freezing. It’s not Halloween yet. It shouldn’t be this cold, I thought. And the temp wasn’t that cold – mid-50’s, but there is a cold, hard blowing wind. And my window is open. And the fan was on. I turned the fan off but I’m not quite ready to close the window yet. I’ll live with being chilly a little longer.

I cleaned up after the puppies, let them out to play, and made myself something to eat. I had a nice snuggle with Yuba, who was happy to hog all my blankets and not share them. Then I got a black felt tip pen, a new 18g needle, and went into my bathroom.

Ten minutes later, I had a 3rd hole in each earlobe, though I had to do the left side twice because the first one was too low. There was a lot of blood – it was running down my face and neck – but it stopped pretty quickly. Still, its really hard to hold onto a fiddly earring back and try to push it into place when your fingers and earlobe are slippery with a ridiculous amount of blood from such a tiny pair of holes.

I have a few new pieces of body jewelry coming in the next few days, and one of them is a super cute nose screw, so that’s what I be piercing next. I’m going to order a pair of bucket forceps and try to do my traguses myself too.

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