Well, if you’re here, you’ve probably followed me over from my WordPress.com hosted site and now you’re here. And as of about fifteen minutes ago, I have a shiny new top level domain name for this blog. Its not a fancy one, but for $0.99 I’m pretty happy with it. Seriously, no reason to spend $15 a year to indulge my ego, ya know?
Tonight the super nice lady I met in Winco came by to pick up her pussy hat, and asked if we might try to be friends. She introduced me to her husband and said most of the people they’ve met here were religious types and that wasn’t working for them. I’m not sure if it was the pussy hat or the stuff amigurumi penises on my shop website that clued her in that I’m definitely not into the big G or super conservative. But either way, maybe we will click and we will all win with new friends. 🙂 I’m hopeful.
I’ve been trying to add new things to my shop but its kind of hit or miss. Mostly its just new items I’ve just made going up, and not the scads of things I made before and never put up. Maybe I will get a handful of them photographed and listed tomorrow.
I still have no idea what’s going on with my disability appeal. And of course the website doesn’t offer me any help in finding out either. Waiting… it sucks.
My Instant Pot is still awesome and makes all the things. I did a beef roast tonight with gravy and a green salad, and tomorrow I’m sure I will use it again- I’ve used it almost every night since it arrived! Love it!
Lucy is continuing her downhill trudge and has been crapping in the house, mostly on the couch, and almost every day. I know she’s old and doesn’t have control any more but ugh. I’m tired of picking up poop all the time. Sashi on the other hand… she’s her normal, boisterous, and outgoingly happy self.
Saturday I got a notice that my disability was being cancelled. I called them and not only are my payments being stopped, but my insurance is being cancelled as well. Why? Because my gynecologist says I’m not disabled. Read that again. My gynecologist says I am not disabled. I had no idea she was a qualified judge of my mental health, or that bipolar disorder and anxiety just vanish one day out of the blue.
I’m going to appeal the decision of course, but until then, this is what I’m looking at.
No insurance means no meds.
No meds means I absolutely cannot work and I will lose pretty much all functionality I have now.
If I can’t work, I definitely can’t afford to pay to get insurance to get my meds. So again, no meds.
With no meds, no functionality, I’ll be reapplying for disability again because I will be unfit for work.
I literally can’t even right now because this is such a fucking clusterfuck.
I can likely still be seen by my psych doctor without income but getting meds is super iffy. And while I would love to work, support myself, and pay my bills like most other people, I can’t even get through a jury duty summons without having panic attacks at the prospect of having to be around strangers for several days running.
I’m high functioning now because I avoid all the things that trigger me and cause me issues. I am med compliant. I do everything I can to make things easier on myself.
But being cut off from my meds and losing my disability status takes all those coping mechanisms away from me and leaves me with nothing but my mental illness.
Yesterday I took Mattie’s dad to run some errands in the afternoon. It was pretty uneventful though we did have an amusing conversation about handicapped parking. He wasn’t ready to go home yet and I wanted to pop by Michael’s for some black embroidery floss, but since he was tired, he opted to wait in the car. I parked in a semi – shady spot and he pointed out the handicapped parking on the other side. This is basically how our conversation went. I might have had to stifle a giggle.
“are you coming in?”
“no but the handicapped parking is over there.”
“but there’s shade here.”
“but I really wanted to use my placard!”
After we finished with his errands I dropped him off and came home to work on my cross stitch project I’m about half done with and to find my package from Joann’s was finally delivered and I got my opal clay and my yarn to finish my triangle scarf I’m crocheting.
I finished my triangle scarf Wednesday afternoon, after adding lots of fringe to it, and using all but about 30″ of the second skein of yarn. I love when I project uses up basically everything! The colors are much more vibrant in real life; this is just a crappy phone picture.
I’m really pleased with it.
I did some more on my cross stitch I’m working on, then made plans to take Mattie’s dad to do the things we didn’t get done yesterday and for Mattie to meet us for dinner. I got home around 730pm and did a little Christmas shopping (I know, its so early but I have money now so did a bit of it) and then we watched some TV when he got home.
Now of course its the middle of the night and I can’t sleep so I’m finishing this blog post and going to work on some other crochet until I get tired. Tomorrow I need to water the plants and take out the recycling as well as finish the dishes. Normal stuff, I just don’t want to do any of it! LOL