Me: Also, I need to pick my whisker again.
Liz: What do you mean “pick your whisker”?
Me: Pluck… stupid phone. I have a mole on my chin that grows an old lady whiskey. Jeez. Old lady whicket. Whisker.
Regarding a car chase on TV…
Me: Oh? Why’s he running?
Tim: No clue.
Me: LOL I just felt like driving fast today, officers!
Tim: XD Hello? 911? There’s a bunch of people following me and I’m freaking out!
Me: LOL OMG I’m dying!
Me: I need to put the trash cans out but I don’t want to go potatoes.
Jami: I hate it when I go potatoes!
Tracy: Sometimes I grow roots and just sit there quietly judging people in my potatoes glory.
Jami: I am couch-potato-ing as we speak!
John: I’m calling the ASPCA.
Me: You probably should. My new puppy was popular at uke club tonight. I spent half the time not playing because everyone else wanted a turn on her.
John: I’m glad I have context because that sounded terrible without it!
This is so true.